I’m constantly asked, “Al, what
should I do about a staff member who has been a good team member in the past
but is now struggling at work because their personal life has hit a giant rock
in the road [or many rocks in the road!]. They’re falling apart at the seams in
life and at work, and it’s causing everyone a lot of stress?”
The reality is sometimes the
team member could be facing tough personal struggles like relationship troubles,
sickness of their own or a family member, addiction and/or financial issues. It’s
easy for them to let the personal strife at home destroy their effectiveness at
work. And it’s easy for them to feel lost and want to throw in the towel on
everything.
It’s a time for love and
tough love.
You need to address the
issue immediately rather than thinking it will blow over if you ignore it. That’s
not very likely. What’s more likely to happen is they will turn this stumble
into a collapse and it will likely undermine the whole team.
My suggestion has been to set
up a one-to-one talk and let them know that you care for them not just as a worker
but as a person. Then, offer assistance either by lending a sympathetic ear,
helping them organize their priorities by dealing with the greatest challenges
in a proactive way or if you feel more comfortable, offer them the opportunity
to see a professional for counseling.
What needs to be made clear
is something along the lines of what I’ve said when I’ve encountered this
situation before:
“You’re more than
just a staff member here. I care about you as a person. But, this is a business
first. Know that I’m here for you. But, you need to be here for yourself first
or the lifeline I’m throwing you will be of no use. Take 10 minutes with me and
write out right now in the left column all that’s going wrong [what you might call
areas of pain] and then in the right column write down all that you’re still
grateful for.”
I know the trick in my own
life in times of trouble has been to see what I saw as a negative at first and
then challenge myself to restate it in the positive. It takes practice and
patience. And we can do the same here including addressing how we can take
steps to get you to a better place. It would be my honor and pleasure to help
right here and right now or refer you to someone professional who can help.
Let me ask you a question
first, how is screwing up at work going to help make any of the other things
going wrong elsewhere in your life better? So as I see it, you can either
choose to put on your blinders when you come to work just like a ballplayer
does and deal with the other stuff when you get home, or you can take an agreed
upon time away to settle the other issues and come back with your head in the
right place.
It takes all of us pulling together
to be successful.
How do you want to proceed?”
It’s been a powerful tonic
for those who wish to take it. Many a good staff member, co-worker, partner and
family member have been saved from early intervention like this.
Special Announcement:
Biz Experts Al Levi and
Ellen Rohr are kicking off a new Teleseminar Series:
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Announcement:
The Step by Step Success program solves
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By: Tender
Posted: March 19, 2010 4:33 AM